Learning to Learn

Working with my foals is always full of powerful moments and breakthroughs for me. I am always touched by how brave and inquisitive these little creatures are and how they will give you so much of their trust if you offer them a good deal. When you work with the blank canvas of a "little" horse so to speak, it shows you a great deal about what our "big" horses are carrying, what has shaped their world. It is also a real insight into the true nature of horses.

This season at my stud I have had the extra enjoyment of foals from 4 different stallions and I can assure you, they are all very different characters, and each has different responses and needs! The opportunity to be a breeder as well as an educator has definitely shaped my concepts and approach when I am coaching and dealing with students and their horses. Its why I personally do not come from a 'method' based viewpoint with my Horsemanship. It can create a narrow focus, becoming results driven. What YOU want, what YOU think needs to be 'taught' or achieved, the right/wrong mentality. In this the beauty of small moments of learning, seeing the try from the horse, and the true concept of "feel" is so easily lost or destroyed.

To treat every horse the same in an almost production line approach, insults the uniqueness and intelligence of both the horses and the humans. The biggest thing that screams at me every season more and more is SOFTEN UP and SLOW DOWN. Yes, this could be the slogan that is printed on a T-Shirt for a lot of occasions in life frankly! It applies so much with our older horses, but its even more vital with youngsters as we must never forget that what we offer our babies is what they will take with them for the rest of their life.

I love the authenticity of horses, and foals are like the dialled up version! They are so straight up in their reactions, they give us almost immediate feedback on our skills. Its an excellent self-evaluation opportunity if we are really interested in growing ourselves as human beings and Horsemen and women. They show you where your timing was off, if you were to quick, too pushy, too determined to achieve something...and they also tell you when you softened, when you released, when you felt for them with your heart not just your hands... Its all there and sometimes it can be confronting, because it's so in our thinking as humans to want to 'fix' and 'control', be it things, people, or animals.

Just being with, waiting, discovering whats possible without trying to influence or manipulate a situation or experience is not the norm, its uncomfortable for us, and there can be a perception that I hear quite often now that you are not "being affective" unless you are getting something done, getting a "result"! But to me there is a certain level of arrogance in the idea that we are the ones doing all the teaching. The horses are teaching us far more about ourselves but we just won't turn the volume down to actually LISTEN. Yes I am repeating myself but I have to share what I know to be true from my own personal experience so...please consider the possibility that SO MUCH learning gets done in the WAITING, in the THINKING, in the time you take to breathe and stop and feel what's going on in your own body and to take responsibility for how and what YOU are communicating....

Consider this thought. Are you intent on TEACHING your foal/horse something, or in creating the space for them to LEARN something? That is my personal commitment. I look at the little faces of my babies and I say to them, I will do my very best to let you learn what you need to do to stay safe and stay alive in this world of humans. They learn to learn. Because when they have this skill they are much better equipped to survive. I show them that some humans can be trusted, that we also have physical boundaries, I let them explore and examine things, to get against their own pressure and find a release rather than me creating pressure that they can't cope with and just have to "submit" too.

I teach them how to follow a feel that is light and clear, that does not pull and demand. I help them to find out that they can yield their bodies and their minds to stay balanced and calm. I also let go of the mistakes I make in the process, and I dont make it mean more then it does. Because even when we mess it up, if our intention is genuine and true, they know and they make up for us along the way. Remember that growth is on the other side of discomfort. Go digging for more. Not more from the horse, more from yourself. If you have horses of any age in your life I am sure you will agree with me that it is a privilege for which we should be grateful. Show your gratitude in your actions not just your words, by staying on the path of learning and growth....

Tamara XO